As most of you know by now, Ed’s dad, Mr. Burton (Rich) has passed away.

I’ve been avoiding writing this post and just about everything else I need to do, mostly because I’ve been lazy, also because this is hard. 

Aftter many calls from Karen (Ed’s mom) and Charles (Ed’s brother) and maybe even some from Grammy (Ed’s grandmother) asking us to please come earlier than Ed’s already bought plane ticket, I finally convinced him that we needed to go.  My parents and I had just driven down to Florida on Thursday, June 23^rd, from Mississippi to pack up some of my things for the impending separation that Ed and I are about to endure.  Sunday, while we were vistiting Karen’s cousin, his wife, and their kid, who had come down to FL for vacation, we got another call from Karen and then again from Charles, saying things had gotten worse and we needed to come immediately.  Karen told us repeatedly that Rich was just hanging on until Ed got there.

All night Sunday night we were trying to find the most reasonably priced tickets we could in order to get us there in the shortest amount of time possible.  We finally found a flight that would get us there Monday night at midnight, leaving in the late morning.  We would have to fly from Fort Myers, FL to Charlotte, NC to Milwaukee, WI and then finally to Omaha, NE where we would then have to drive what we found out would be three hours because of the Missouri River flooding and road construction.

When we got to the airport, we were trying to board the plane, I was going first, and when the nice guy at the counter scanned my ticket he said, “huh…wait a sec.”  I kind of got worried when after the second and third tries he still couldn’t get my ticket to work.  Ed volunteered that his ticket was the same and would probably do the same, and it did.

He then stopped boarding the plane and brought us over to a kiosk where he rerouted us.  I was about to say something when he said, “don’t complain, you’re going to like this.”  And we did…he rerouted us straight from Fort Myers to Wisconsin then to Omaha, shaving a big 8 hours off our trip, getting us to Rich sooner.  We had an awesome flight, with exit row seating and were able to get to Iowa by early afternoon.

Charles met us at the airport and drove us to Sioux City.  We met road construction and awful drivers the whole way, making the normal one hour trip take three hours.  Every so often, Karen would call in somewhat of a panic, asking where we were, saying we needed to hurry.  Charles of course was already doing 90+ mph when he could.

The next part is the hardest part for me.  We arrived is Sioux City and we immediately jumped out of the car and went inside, not worrying about our luggage or anything else.  When we walked upstairs to the living room, we saw the hospice bed that had been set up last time we were there and in it was the ghost of a man I once knew.  He looked nothing like himself.  Just a month before when we had been in Iowa, he was running up the stairs telling us he was not ready to die and that he was going to fight.  Unfortunately, the cancer had a different plan.  I already started to miss his, “Hey Kid!,” “Whatcha doin kiddos?,” and “hey darlin’”’s.

Ed had 22 hours with had dad before he passed.  He sat there and held his hand and talked to him.  It was one of the most heartbreaking things I have ever seen.  I kept thinking to myself, that my poor “bottom” (Ed’s nickname) had lost his mother to cancer and had now lost his father. It breaks my heart, as well as Ed’s, knowing that his parents will not be there to see our children and at the same time, we are so thankful that Karen will be there to share in those moments with us.  Grammy, who helped raise Ed and Charles when their mother died, will also be there to help our children know the great man that was their grandfather.  

Long over due and yet still nothing to say…

I guess you can say a lot has happened since I last posted and I’ve been super busy. Hence I have not posted.  However, I still have nothing to say, nothing good anyway.

Ed’s dad is still basically the same.  Nothing new, really.  They did make the trip up to their cottage at Lake Okoboji.  Rich seems to be much happier and relaxed there.  He does seem to sleep a little more than before.

I came back to Mississippi to do some professional development and will sign my contract on July 14^th.  I have to be back August first as well for more professional development. Currently I’m looking for a place to live, without any luck.  More on that later.

I started my second masters program this summer. MA in Teaching Foreign Language with a Concentration in Teaching English as a Second or Other Language.  It’s a lot of work already, so I’m not sure what’s going to happen when I start teaching full time.

Ed is still looking and applying for jobs in Mississippi.  He got an interview for a job in Ruston, LA, but that’s really just too far away to commute, especially since we only have one car and the job didn’t pay that well.

Summer is having a girl.  She is super excited about that.  Just what she wanted.

I think that’s all the real updating.

Update: 05/23/11

I wanted to wait a couple days to update because you never know what is going to change and when.  Rich (Ed’s dad) is doing much, MUCH better.  He gained enough strength to be released from the hospital Friday.  While he was being released, hospice came and set up a hospital bed in the living room and switched out his oxygen tanks.

At that point, the plan was to go home and get strong enough for chemo.  I think coming home has really helped.  He’s been getting up and walking around more, taking regular showers, and is having to use his oxygen less and less. It also helps that he can actually eat and sleep when he wants without constant interruption from nurses (and 11 p.m. cleaning ladies!).  Yesterday we even went for a little car ride, just to get out of the house and see some sun.  He’s eating more and more (which is good!) and he has got some fight in him.  When we first got here, it seemed like he was ready to give up.

While the hospice nurses were here, he ran up the stairs and told them that he just wasn’t ready yet and that he was going to fight!  Karen and I were both sitting there, very surprised at this sudden burst.  But since then he’s been gung-ho and ready to beat this.  He's got a doctors appointment today, right about the time that we leave, and hopefully we'll hear nothing but good news!

Today is our last day here.  We fly out at 2:30 p.m. after we drive to Omaha.  I really hope that his get-up-and-go sticks around after we leave.  Karen said, that us being here has really helped.  I’m not sure how, but we’re glad it did!

Iowa Update: 05/16/2011

We arrived in Sioux City, IA late, late Friday night.  Ed’s dad, Rich, had already been in the hospital for an infection.  Saturday, we went to visit him.  When we first got to the hospital to see him, he was pretty down.  Not really speaking coherently and sleeping most of the time.  We stayed around a bit.  He ate and got some fluids.  A little later, he was feeling better so he got up and we played card games in the hospitals family room.  We had a good time laughing and playing Uno.  He gained a lot of strength while we were there. 

The next day (yesterday), he was released in the afternoon and Ed made our normal, Nummy pizza for dinner.  He had plenty of food and fluids and was doing pretty good.  We all went to bed, but Rich didn’t sleep well.  He has nightmares and woke up in the night having difficulty breathing. 

When we woke up he was sitting in his comfy chair with his oxygen, still having difficulty breathing.  He had a doctors appointment at 10:30 today (05/16) and the doctor found that he had fluid on his belly, among other things.  The doctor decided that he should be readmitted to the hospital.  After a CAT scan, they determined that he had another blood clot in his lungs and that is what had woken him up during the night.  The fluid on his belly is also causing the labored breathing.

In addition, the tumors on his liver have multiplied.  The last time they went to Mayo, Karen counted 11 tumors.  Today, they showed more than 50.  At this point, they don’t think he will be well enough to start chemo.  They give him one to two weeks.

mfG,

Alexis

Cancer and how it spreads...

As I have posted before, Ed's dad has cancer.  At first we thought that the lung cancer from last year had spread.  But evidently that is not the case.  Soon after the lung cancer was taken care of last year, Rich was diagnosed as a diabetic.  Little did we (or the doctors) know then, that he had developed pancreatic cancer.

So a year later, we all thought he was cancer free until a month or so ago, a blood clot loosen itself from his lungs and caused him to have a little mini stroke.  More and more testing revealed more and more bad news.  Spots on the liver turned to cancer, which we then found out was pancreatic cancer.

Some good news in all this, they check his stomach and lower GI tract and those areas are cancer free so far.  So no colostomy bag and he can still eat what he wants!

The following are parts of email updates from Karen:


April 28:
"The oncology department called yesterday requesting that we return a day earlier than what had been scheduled for additional tests.  This morning Rich is having his stomach scoped because they are concerned about possible tumors.  Rich has been extremely tired - now sleeping most of the day on and off.  After the tests this morning we will see the nurse practitioner, Erin, in oncology this afternoon to review the test results.

Rich was to begin chemotherapy tomorrow but the results today may change the type and frequency of his treatments, as well as when he will begin the process.  We will just have to wait for more information."


April 29:
"This morning we arrived by 6:30am and tests began at 7am on the lower GI and die cast CT so he will be back for more than 2 hours.  ASAP upon coming out he will want COFFEE and something to eat.  We see the doctor and nurse pracitioner at 1:30pm today.  They still have him scheduled for chemotherapy at 2:30pm today but will learn more at 1:30."


April 30:
"Well, as you all know when dealing with cancer it can be a roller coaster ride for all of us!  We were called by Mayo to return as soon as possible on Wednesday afternoon for early morning test on Thursday.  So packed and off we drove to Rochester.  On Thursday, as I shared, we received news from the upper GI tests that there was no cancer in his stomach or esophagus.  Early Friday morning, Rich went back, ALL cleaned out, for the die scans of the lower GI.  These tests revealed more of the story, his colon was clear but they found a tumor at the base of the pancreas.  Now, a new team of "GI" doctors were injected into the picture to evaluate the results of Rich's tests.  Rich has pancreatic cancer so that means that the tumors on his liver moved from the pancreas.  Rich does not have lung cancer.  Both teams, lung and GI specialists, confirmed that the surgeon of January 2010 did in fact get all of the tumor in his lung.  These doctors informed us that pancreatic cancer is the "silent cancer" and in Rich's case he has had it for about 6 to 9 months thus it has reached stage 4.

The chemotherapy treatments for this cancer is taken one day per week for three weeks in a row, then one week off.  Because of this schedule we will be doing the treatment as recommended by Mayo which is gemcitabine chemotherapy. The most fact is that Rich's tumor is located at the tail of the pancreas which means that we can explore surgery BUT we have to find out how large the tumor is before proceeding.  There are options to consider which is so important even though we know that pancreatic cancer is very serious.  We proceed with optimism and hope."


May 3:
"Yesterday, we received word from all the doctors; the Mayo GI specialists, our family doctor, local surgeon, and oncologist, that Rich's tumor is not operable.  At this time we are planning to go ahead with chemo treatments locally.  The Mayo Clinic doctors all recommended that he stay home for these treatments because he must go one day per week for three weeks then off the fourth week and he must reserve his energy to battle the cancer not for traveling 285 miles one way. The June Nylen Cancer Center of Sioux City will be utilizing the very same chemo that Mayo would have at their clinic.  Currently, these treatments will be indefinite but every two weeks there will be scans to see if the treatments are holding and/or making the tumors smaller.  Both teams will review the scans and if Mayo concludes that is beneficial to return then they will indicate that finding and we will head north again.

Rich is extremely tired each day and rests on and off throughout the day.  Currently, he is experiencing a little pain in the area of the pancreas but the doctors all say that is to be expected.

The sunshine and warmer temps have helped to lighten our spirits as we continue with hope down this road to battle Rich's pancreatic cancer.  Again, your many emails/texts of support and prayers means the world to the entire family."


May 4:
--After a phone call from Karen and Rich, we decided to go ahead and by plane tickets to go see them.  We will be heading to Sioux City, IA, May 13-23 and may return soon after.  They need all the support right now that they can get.  Ed will be able to work some remotely and I can continue my classes and job search from there.  Ebba will be staying at one of Ed's co-workers house while we are gone.--


May 5:
"When are you are coming?"


Although cancer is already serious by nature, you can see the escalating seriousness that has quickly followed in the last week or so.  


So that should get everyone up to speed about the situation and give you an idea of how we're all feeling.