Decision made…

So…out of four choices….

1)    the house for rent:  850/month, 500 deposit, and probably about 400 in utilities, in town

2)    the apartment:  right under 700/month, 150 deposit, 200ish in utilities, 30 min commute

3)    a friend: 150/month, 45 min commute

4)    home with the parents, 200 in gas, 1 hour 15 min commute

After much calculation and some reasoning/rationalizing with one of my best friends, Alisa, I came to the conclusion that option 1, is out of the question, just too expensive for what we would get and would take all our extra money, defeating the purpose.  Option 2, where more reasonable, still didn’t allow us to save enough to pay off our credit cards within a reasonable amount of time.

So now it’s down to option 3 and 4.

Living with friends is hard…but what’s harder?  Being an adult and living with your parents or living with friends?

I know what living with friends can do, you have to work at it so you don’t ruin your friendship.  Sometimes you have to let some things go even though the bother you.  Or if you get on each other’s nerves, sometimes you just have to let it go. For the sake of the relationship, and the living situation.

My parents would probably just drive me insane.  Plus, the commute is further and did I mention my parents would drive me insane?  I mean, I can always take a break if I need to and come here.  But I think living here would just…drive me insane.

So, it’s option 3!  I’m living with a friend!  Dee, I hope you know how much living with friends changes things!  It’s not going to be a cakewalk!  Although we can walk…and eat cake…

So, by living with my friend Dee…and we’re hoping that this is only 3-4 months…Ed and I will be able to pay of our debt and then we can afford for him to quit his job in Florida and move to Mississippi.

And to clear that up:  We can’t afford to move and only have one income, so Ed is keeping his job in Florida, until we pay off some of our debt (we’re hoping only 3-4 months).  So yes, we will be living apart for a few months.  But by saving money and sacrificing some comforts, we’ll be able to pay off some of our debt and be able to afford more “luxuries” in the future, luxuries like…living together…soooo sad. 

We also hope to build our credit up real high so that if we decide we like teaching in Mississippi, we can possibly buy a house.  Because BUYing a house costs a lot less than renting, I’m talking the difference in 400$ mortgage on a 3/2 house or renting a 2/1 for 900$.  I know there are other costs when buying and if something breaks, we have to fix it.  But we wouldn’t buy until we had the second income and some other things in place, like a new couch, and a new computer, and of course some more serious things like, a down payment, etc.

So even though this is a difficult time, with the health of Ed’s dad deteriorating, we will be living apart, adding more stress.  But we’re trying to think long term benefits, so hopefully all this stress and being apart will pay off in the long run.

Here’s to hoping! (chugs a bottle of wine)

20…what…noooo it’s the 1960’s…

Here I thought it was 2011….and then I began the process of moving back to Mississippi.  Most people around here don’t notice the problem because it’s accepted practice.  But after moving away from Mississippi for so long and living in places like Illinois, Germany, and Florida, I must have just forgotten.  I actually think the problem is that I did most of my growing up and forming of views away from Mississippi.  And now that I’m coming back, it’s just shocking.

Example 1:

I was on the phone with a real estate gentleman talking about rental properties.  He was very nice and extremely helpful.  We talked for about 30 minutes, even though he didn’t have any properties available at the moment.  We talked about different areas, the potential of buying,  what I was looking for, and all the other things people talk about when moving to a new area.  He was giving me different options when he paused, and the conversation continued like this:

Gentleman: Now, I don’t want to offend you, but let me ask you a question.

Me: OK.

G: are you black or white?

M: well I’m white, sir.

G:  OH, ok, well…I just won’t want to put a little white girl in an all black neighborhood…

(.5)

G: and I wouldn’t want to put a little black girl in an all white neighborhood either…

(.5)

G: and I ask because you could have been a well-educated black girl

(.5)

M: oh.

COME ON.  This is TWO THOUSAND ELEVEN!!!           

Example 2:

This one took place in person, with a little lady who lived out in the country.  She was very well educated, a lawyer, owns several businesses, and owns over 20 rental properties.

Lady:  I can tell over the phone what kind of people you are…and then I make it harder if I don’t like the way they sound.

Me: (blink…blink…)

L:  See…you would get the short application, because you’re good people…and somebody else, you know, like (points in the direction of a rental house where an African American family lived)…they get the long application.

M:  Oh, well what’s the difference? I’m not sure I understand?

L:  Oh well that’s just a way where I can weed out who I want living in my rental properties, cause you know, if they have any kind of problems, I don’t have to rent to them…but you get the short application, cause you’re good people.

I wanted to ask her…Really?  How do you know I’m, “Good people”? 

After talking to Ed about it, we decided I should go back and act all stupid and drunk, with loud music and see what she says then.  Wear some kind of skanky outfit and freak her out.

I mean come on… good god… it’s 2011…

Maybe I’m the stupid one, naïve at best, to believe that things have changed.  How are we to move on from the past if people can’t let it go?  I know things aren’t that simple, but things can’t get better around here the way they are now…

The Great Mississippi Home hunt of 2011…

And by great, I mean it sucks ass…

So according to everyone who knows anything about Vicksburg, MS, there are absolutely no houses to rent in Vicksburg, for a decent price, in a decent neighborhood.  According to a couple realtors, the real estate market in Vicksburg was not affected in the recent boom.  Also, rental properties come at a premium.  Because houses are so cheap, most people just buy them.  But for those who can’t buy (yeah, that’d be me) and want to live in a nice, safe area, pay biiiiiiig money, which I don’t have either.  So what does a poor girl, with a new job, and meh credit do?  No fucking clue.  Still trying to figure that one out.  On top of all that, because of the “Great Mississippi River Flood of 2011,”  all the rental properties are full of teanats who have been misplaced by the flooding or have been hauled in for the next couple of years to fix problems caused by the flooding, making it IMPOSSIBLE to find a place to rent.  Everyone, who doesn’t know me, keeps telling me, “Oh, you should just buy!”  Oh, I would love to!  Just, I’ve spent my whole adult life trying to get a better education so that “all my dreams will come true,” which means taking out some loans and having a credit card here or there to live on.  And now this whole economic crisis bullshit has come along, fucking up all my plans and dreams, etc. etc. etc.

Needless to say, I’m bitter…angry…and sad…Oh, and kind of homeless.

Sooooo if you know of anything decent in a decent price range…oh, now wait, we should talk about what a decent price range is.  A lot of people have told me, “Oh, I know a great cheap place!” and I say, “Really?!? How much?” “Oh, it’s such a steal! It’s a one bedroom one bath for 1,250$ a month!”  and this is where in my head I go off like this, “Bitch, you don’t know what cheap is.  Why don’t you go crawl back up your daddy’s ass and let him buy you another new car?”  Where in reality, I say, “Oh, well isn’t that just nice.”  Bitch please.  A decent price, is one that a person on a single salary can afford and have money left over to do things like…eat…buy gas for the car…maaaybe have internet…and I hear there’s this thing that you watch on TV called cable….that might be nice to have for a while.  So what’s the magic number? Well it’s not 1,250$ for sure!  How about, 800$ OR LESS!

So, like I was saying, before I had to correct a bitch.  If you hear of anything in Vicksburg, MS for rent for a decent price, in a decent neighborhood.  Please let me know.  I’d appreciate it greatly.

Long over due and yet still nothing to say…

I guess you can say a lot has happened since I last posted and I’ve been super busy. Hence I have not posted.  However, I still have nothing to say, nothing good anyway.

Ed’s dad is still basically the same.  Nothing new, really.  They did make the trip up to their cottage at Lake Okoboji.  Rich seems to be much happier and relaxed there.  He does seem to sleep a little more than before.

I came back to Mississippi to do some professional development and will sign my contract on July 14^th.  I have to be back August first as well for more professional development. Currently I’m looking for a place to live, without any luck.  More on that later.

I started my second masters program this summer. MA in Teaching Foreign Language with a Concentration in Teaching English as a Second or Other Language.  It’s a lot of work already, so I’m not sure what’s going to happen when I start teaching full time.

Ed is still looking and applying for jobs in Mississippi.  He got an interview for a job in Ruston, LA, but that’s really just too far away to commute, especially since we only have one car and the job didn’t pay that well.

Summer is having a girl.  She is super excited about that.  Just what she wanted.

I think that’s all the real updating.

Sigh...

We always worry about things when we're gone for an extended length of time.  First, is the car safe where we parked it.  Yes!  Second, did someone break in....  Well we pulled up and a light was on that we didn't leave on.  But it's not the culprit you may think it to be.

We knew this would happen, we've just been avoiding it because we do not have a way to fix it.  But after moving to four different apartments in three different states.  The ol Ikea bookshelf decided to give up. And while on her way down, she managed to flip the light switch.

She's been holding on to alll those books for sooooo long.  From first glance, it seem like the only damage is to one of my two matching lamps (it's shattered) and my avocado seeds (which were all knocked over and their water spilled on the carpet...which is now dry and doesn't seem to show any signs of the incident).  We'll see tomorrow morning if there is any more damage.

And the last thing we always wonder (if we didn't take her with us), is Ebba ok?  I'm pretty sure she is.  She's in good hands and we'll pick her up tomorrow afternoon.

Update: 05/23/11

I wanted to wait a couple days to update because you never know what is going to change and when.  Rich (Ed’s dad) is doing much, MUCH better.  He gained enough strength to be released from the hospital Friday.  While he was being released, hospice came and set up a hospital bed in the living room and switched out his oxygen tanks.

At that point, the plan was to go home and get strong enough for chemo.  I think coming home has really helped.  He’s been getting up and walking around more, taking regular showers, and is having to use his oxygen less and less. It also helps that he can actually eat and sleep when he wants without constant interruption from nurses (and 11 p.m. cleaning ladies!).  Yesterday we even went for a little car ride, just to get out of the house and see some sun.  He’s eating more and more (which is good!) and he has got some fight in him.  When we first got here, it seemed like he was ready to give up.

While the hospice nurses were here, he ran up the stairs and told them that he just wasn’t ready yet and that he was going to fight!  Karen and I were both sitting there, very surprised at this sudden burst.  But since then he’s been gung-ho and ready to beat this.  He's got a doctors appointment today, right about the time that we leave, and hopefully we'll hear nothing but good news!

Today is our last day here.  We fly out at 2:30 p.m. after we drive to Omaha.  I really hope that his get-up-and-go sticks around after we leave.  Karen said, that us being here has really helped.  I’m not sure how, but we’re glad it did!

Job Interview...

So I had a job interview yesterday for a German position at Vicksburg High School in Vicksburg, MS.  I was rally nervous because this is ultimately me dream job.  To be in control of a German program at a high school where I can help it grow and realize the potential of the German language.

The interview wasn’t until four p.m., but we headed home to “get ready” at about 3:15.  The principal at Vicksburg High School, Mr. Derek Reed, very so kindly let me do the interview over the phone because of the current situation: living in Florida, just flew to Iowa, and the seriousness of the situation with Ed’s dad.

I was told that there old be 4-5 other people on the other end of the phone (Mr. Reed, two assistant principles, head of the Modern Language Department, and possibly one other person), so I was really nervous.  I thought back to the phone calls on skype when there were more than one person on the other end and you start to talk over one another.  The idea of that happening made me even more nervous.

It was 4 p.m. and I was sitting on the bed waiting.  Only Ed and I were home, so the house was nice and quiet.  At 4:05 I thought, well maybe it was at 4:30. 

At 4:10 my phone rings.  It’s Mr. Reed.  He asks me if I was waiting on his call for the interview….welll duh!  And so he said, “Let’s get this thing started.”  I expected then for the others to join in.  But it was just him.  He asked me the normal interview questions, which took about 15 minutes.  And mostly because I talked A LOT.  He did the normal, “Do you have any questions?” question, to which I asked a couple questions. 

He then said that at this point he would normally tell the applicant that they would have to discuss all the applicants with the other principles and decision makers and get back to me in about a week, but he had already made his decision and asked me if I wanted the job!

Of course I immediately said yes, in hopes that we can work everything out.  A lot has to happen before we can actually accept the job and move to MS, but there was no way I was telling him no!

So we’ve got a lot to discuss, plan, and research in the next few weeks.

We decided later in the evening to send Mr. Reed an email and ask for help finding Ed a job.  We attached Ed’s resume and other important information and hoped he could direct us to something.  Early this morning (7:30), Mr. McDonald, one of the assistant principles, called me to ask what Ed wanted to do and the types of jobs he is interested in.  He then said that he would forward Ed’s information to a couple of the jobs that had already closed that he thought Ed would do well.

So it’s looking possible that Ed and I both might have jobs in Vicksburg soon!

Iowa Update: 05/16/2011

We arrived in Sioux City, IA late, late Friday night.  Ed’s dad, Rich, had already been in the hospital for an infection.  Saturday, we went to visit him.  When we first got to the hospital to see him, he was pretty down.  Not really speaking coherently and sleeping most of the time.  We stayed around a bit.  He ate and got some fluids.  A little later, he was feeling better so he got up and we played card games in the hospitals family room.  We had a good time laughing and playing Uno.  He gained a lot of strength while we were there. 

The next day (yesterday), he was released in the afternoon and Ed made our normal, Nummy pizza for dinner.  He had plenty of food and fluids and was doing pretty good.  We all went to bed, but Rich didn’t sleep well.  He has nightmares and woke up in the night having difficulty breathing. 

When we woke up he was sitting in his comfy chair with his oxygen, still having difficulty breathing.  He had a doctors appointment at 10:30 today (05/16) and the doctor found that he had fluid on his belly, among other things.  The doctor decided that he should be readmitted to the hospital.  After a CAT scan, they determined that he had another blood clot in his lungs and that is what had woken him up during the night.  The fluid on his belly is also causing the labored breathing.

In addition, the tumors on his liver have multiplied.  The last time they went to Mayo, Karen counted 11 tumors.  Today, they showed more than 50.  At this point, they don’t think he will be well enough to start chemo.  They give him one to two weeks.

mfG,

Alexis

Up in the air...

That seems to describe our lives for the last couple of years.  The most common phrase in our household is, “Let’s wait until  _____.”  You can fill in the blank with phrases like, “we start school,” “we finish school,” “we get there,” “we find out about ____,” and the list goes on and on. 

There are a lot of exciting/emotional things going on right now.  Ed has his job here in FL at FGCU, but I’m still looking.  I have a potential job at a high school a little over an hour away, but it depends on the FL legislature and which way they vote on the class size amendment.  I read an article that they capped classes at the larger number, so I’m still unsure if I have a job here or not.  I continue to apply in this area, but after the “traumatic” experience of the Collier county recruitment fair, I’ve expanded my job search a little further.  How much further? Eh… all 50 states? Sort of.  If they have a German position, I’m applying.  But if not, I’m sticking to the southern states.  The next time we move we’d like to move to a place where we both have job offers and be closer to family.

That being said, I applied for a German position at Vicksburg High School in Vicksburg, MS.  It’s very rare for a German position to come open in MS.  So I jumped at the opportunity to apply.  I wasn’t sure when the ad been posted, so I called the school to get some more info.  Turns out the posting was closing and they wanted to do interviews the very next week.  The nice little lady at human resources told me I could speed up my application (because it is a snail mail only process) by emailing her my resume.  I quickly assured her that I could email her everything they could possibly need to hire me and so I did.  She then forwarded my email directly to the principal.  And that was it.

Ed always tells me to apply and forget about it….and that’s really hard for me to do.  I usually obsess about everything.  I mean, if it’s a job that I really want, I think about it.  Is that not normal?  But I tried my best not to think about it.  We’re getting ready to go to Iowa to visit Ed’s parents, so I did some house cleaning.  I checked my phone and noticed I hat two missed calls and a new voicemail.  One of the missed calls was form mom, so I just figured she left the voicemail, especially since I didn’t recognize the other number.  I’ve been getting a lot of wrong numbers lately.  So I called mom back and chatted for a while.  Afterwards, I did some laundry and thought back to the voicemail.  So I went back to my phone and gave it a listen.

“Hi Ms. Whittington.  This is Jamie Creel, the assistant principal at Vicksburg High School.  We looked over your resume and are very, VERY impressed.  We’d like to get you in here for an interview on May 17^th.  Please give me a call.”

Um…AHH. So I called back immediately and he was on bus duty.  I called back the recommended 15 minutes later and he was in a meeting.  So I called back today and they again said that they wanted me to come in for an interview.  I told them my situation that I was flying to Iowa this Friday and not coming back for over a week and on top of that I live in FL.  I asked if it were possible to do a phone interview and it was confirmed.  Phone interview, May 17^th and 4 p.m. 

I’m super excited.  This is a great opportunity (if I get the job) to stay in an area for a long time, we may be able to finally settle!  But all of this depends on if I get the job, if Ed can get a job in the area, etc.

At the same time, I tend to be a mental cart before horse thinker.  So of course I went to zillow.com and started looking at houses in the area.  I also contacted a friend who lives in Vicksburg and asked about potential areas to or not to live in, in Vicksburg.  Zillow showed some beautiful houses in our price range. 

So all our hopes and dreams are still up in the air.  If I get a job here, we want to move, possibly by a car, get some real furniture, and a host of other things.

If we both get jobs in MS, we have to move, possibly get a car, hopefully get some real furniture, and again, a host of other things. 

Also, when we both get jobs, wherever that might be, we want to move to a house.  Whether we rent or buy, we don’t’ want to share walls any more.  Having neighbors is nice, creates a sense of community, etc., but this whole sharing a wall thing has got to stop.  I’ll save the neighbor rant for another post.

3 posts in one day...

I told you I was playing catch up!

On a lighter note from my previous post, we did have a pretty good weekend.  Saturday afternoon, our friend Alan came to visit.  We did some beach time and the normal deep-thought-discussions, and of course the fun back-and-forth banter.

Monday we decided to rent ocean kayaks and  try out the bay.  I wasn't thrilled about the idea because of my previous experience on smaller kayaks (and this is why my kayak is still in Sioux City...it can stay there right now!).  So everything seemed ok, we put the color in the kayak, geared up, and set out.  We saw some manatees and got pretty close to some dolphins.  No pictures, because it's hard to paddle and work a camera.  We were kind of chasing this pretty big dolphin when about an hour or more from the marina where we started and in the midst of little mangrove islands, Ed says, "hey guys, is my boat sinking?"  I turned to him and said, "why yes, yes it is."  So Alan and I went to Ed's aid and unloaded the cooler onto my ankles and Alan shared some of the weight by taking on some bottles and what not.

It was clear that Ed wouldn't make it back to any type of shore in that boat.  We looked around and saw a couple fishing boats and thought it would be best to try to reach one of them for help.  So I headed as fast as I could across some open-ish water to the nearest boat.

When I got there, all out of breath with cotton-mouth, I apologized profusely for disturbing their fishing trip and interrupting their day.  They looked at me like I was a disease or sea scum that they just wanted to be rid of.  I had to BEG them to help us.  After they finally agreed they headed to help Ed and I started the paddle back to where they were.  Just as I got back, they were pulling away to take Ed back to the marina where we rented the kayaks.  Alan and I sat there for a few seconds trying to decide if we were going to wait for them to come back or if we were going to head back.  We very quickly decided to head back and charged forward with the return trip.

It didn't take us too long, because we (or at least I) were no longer distracted by dolphins and manatees.  I just wanted to be on land!  We made it all the way back and the Crazy Kayak Lady was just then securing a boat to go get the sinking kayak.

So after docking our kayaks, we all hopped on a pontoon boat and headed back out to the bay to find Ed's sunken ship kayak.  We realized that we hadn't reeaaaallllly followed the map on our way out, but we didn't have much trouble locating the kayak.  We had shoved it up in a mangrove cave and it was still  there, safe and sinking.  We pulled it up on the pontoon boat and headed back, saw some more manatees and some crazy diving birds.

The Crazy Kayak Lady didn't charge us and we got a pontoon boat ride out of it.  So all in all the day was good!  Not to mention getting that close to the manatees and dolphins.  Although I think we were just as close to them when we were at the beach as we were when we were kayaking.

gooood times, gooooooood times...